Still of the Day
Meta
Encouragement Letter
these days aren’t the greatest of days and i haven’t been allowing God’s grace to teach me by going to my friends- the friends that have taught me what friendship really was, what humility was purposed for, and what giving sacrificed.
i have great friends in SJ and they always work by my side, but i’ve missed my friends that i’ve made in North Jersey. Just when i thot life was complete with a second family- my SJ church, He graciously blessed me with friends just as close to me…friends who i can rely on and some who i can show my weaknesses to, who i can cry to.
i received a funny yet endearing letter from one of my dearest porch buddy by day, mananangal by night. the infamous- PAUL TENORIO. Hahaha…here’s a bit of what he wrote…for the FIC’ers reading this, i hope you too can see that at least there’s still people who remember how it use to be…
i’m sure Paul won’t mind i share this with everyone 
. if so paul, bite me (but only after 12am! hahahhah)
—————————————–
well yeah i’m replying to that thank you card that you sent pungus…grabe!! didn’t have to do that but it was very encouraging and thank you to all the infinity exponent and subtract porter’s left butt and divide that by the # of her cleaning people and then take the derivative and then square it to come up with the final answer owwwwwwwww… anyways, ihope and pray that you’re feeling better right now andi know it might still be a little difficult at times but be strong fabs ha!! and remember what we talkedabout on the phone and hopefully sinulat mo sa red journal which i will try to get one of these days and CUT!! just never forget the goals that you have set for yourself and put yourself first once in a while ches instead of worrying how others would feel..i know that sounds really selfish but sometimes it’s hard to encourage others too when you yourself is struggling inside you know…i hope that you will stick with those goals and i know you have a lot of dreams that you still want to fulfill and so go get them fabs!! don’t let your dreams be just dreams do something about them cuz that’s how we’ll know if those dreams were meant to come true or not right??
there were a lot of things that struck me on that card you sent me..grabe fabs..it seemed like we haven’t talked to each other in decades!! and like what you said i do come across those times when i still miss everyone but i just had to accept the reality that things won’t be the same and i can already see that…people moving on to bigger and better things…and when you said “sometimes i have moments when i really miss you guys but wonder if everyone’s care for each just faded” grabe when you figure out the answer let me know ok!!! that something that i’ve always wondered but i thought i was the only one who felt that way you know…and sometimes i also wonder if people appreciate the things that you do for them you know?? i already told myself that i’m only probably going to hold on to those few friends in FIC that i know will be there in the long run you know cuz it’s hard to find those people and i think it’s part of GOD’s plan that HE made sure that we have the bond with each other before we all leave rutgers…grabe ithink that i have to agree with you with the care for each other just faded–hmmmm…this will be the topic of our next porch time!!! hahaha…and make sure you can support your argument (sounds like expos class)…we definitely should have a get together and hopefully soon we should get those funguses to come down to south jersey cuz i’m so tired of going up north grabe!!! it’s their turn to come down south right?? i mean there’s a lot of open fields that we can show them and not to mention one of south jersey’s tourist attractions–the bank in sewell that lookslike a car repair shop (owww do you remember that bank??)…hahaha…
ok ches baka inaantok or natatae ka na sa kakabasa nito so i’ll end it here for now…and by the way the charge for our conversation: my minute rate is $10 a minute so for 45 minutes it’ll be $450 PLUS there’s a mananangal sales tax in nj which is 100% so you owe me $900 and that’s due next week alright!!! ok fabs just hang in there ok and be strong and do whatever it is that will make you a stronger person inside and getting those goals accomplished…just call me up if you ever need anything and i don’t care how late you call either just do it and i promise i won’t be charging you any fees either…let’s keep encouraging each other alright
ches…take care and here FLYING KISS with colgate breath + vanilla chai breath and CATCH and please don’t give my flying kiss to porter or ana alright…ingat ha–miss you fabs and CUT!! i hope to see you soon!!!your porch buddy–
shakalakaboom
Self Change
i was reading that this afternoon my lil’ sister’s xanga page and i admire her truthfulness and admit to my incurable comment about her cockiness. i think sometimes that i used to think the way she did when i was her age…maybe even more depressed than she is. My self-image was flaccid and even though tried to portray an impermeable skin, inside i was always analyzing myself- why i am the way i am, why i do the things i do, and why i think the way i think.
the truth about a living creation is that he/she is created specifically unique and one must accept who one is once one know who he/she is, but the beauty of living creation is the ability to change. Self-perception is a progression, and shouldn’t be confined or solidified. What i don’t like about certain people is that they stick too much on what depresses them, rather than change towards happiness. People complain about other people’s tendency to draw away from them, but don’t try to better their social attitude. I understand when people are depressed about themselves, and believe me, WE ALL GO THROUGH A PERIOD WHEN WE DON’T BELIEVE IN OURSELVES, but the fault lies in the person who is prideful enough not to change, but expects the world to just accept them as well as change for them.
Extinction is the only conclusion to the flower or plant that does not adapt to its surroundings. Even flowers learn their lesson that they need to grow taller to get sunlight. Even plants evolve because if they remained exactly the same from day one, they would be erased from existence, but their uniqueness is still conveyed by their accepted and appreciated colors and shape. We too need to be proud enough to respect what God gave us, but equally we need to be humble enough to admit our imperfect personalities. And sometimes, yes, in between are those moments of despondency and retreat back into our shell…but sorry is the man that stays in stagnation- complaining and shouting his woes.
i remember once, in my early teens, wondering why i wasn’t popular…why people liked certain people in the church and ignored a darkling like me…i played with my thoughts, and prayed with my pencil…i cried with the rain and blamed every circumstance. i was prudish and cocky, and thought i was better than the rest although no one knew it. but through the years, i learned what the sweetness of friendship can do, what a listening ear can accomplish, and what giving hands can build. I’ve learned that emitting fear through leadership only acquires fear from those following you, but love begets love from those who choose to follow you.
i admit my nastiness, and i readily admit to still having remnants of the old me, the me that bathes in self-pity AND pride…but i want to accomplish humility. i want to learn how to be taught, how to listen, how to cry with those who cry, and how to give without being given to. I still struggle with my self-perception as my little sister does, but i rest in knowing that at least i am showing myself the areas of renovation, and continuously change.
i hope though in light of all this, kristie will continue to really write honestly without restraint on how she feels…i accept her honesty as hopefully she can accept mine.
First BASIC
today, i woke up at 7am, grabbed my Bible, guitar, & banig- & set out 4 my backyard. the grass was wet but i laid out my straw blanket anyways.
today was our first Early Morning Prayer Meeting. i remember many groups in Rutgers used 2 be sooo devoted 2 prayer, that they even got up around 6am 2 pray…i wanted 2 bring the same devotion 2 SJ. I know it`s hard 2 sacrifice sleep but i`m really praiseful that 4 people came 2 the mat 2 pray, maybe even more in their own rooms, but it was a refreshing time.
basically, we prayed 4 the people in our youth group. we prayed 4 individual names. i want us 2 learn how 2 be more invested in each other through prayer, not so we change their lives just because we uttered their names, & that the power was through our words, but so that we may learn how 2 care 4 their needs in lifting up their burdens; & it is our faith in which we grow closer 2 our intimacy with the Father.
how great 2 pray in the confines of secrecy but how sweet 2 pray with your friends.
-
Recent Comments
Perze’s Updates
Chesa’s Updates
